Let me tell you how I met three people who changed my life. They were vampires but that wasn’t the reason. Well, it was part of the reason, but not the entire thing.
It was like this…
At the Castle Andriescu in the wild mountains of Transylvania, it was a dark and stormy night…
Wait, wait…it wasn’t that way at all. It wasn’t night, it wasn’t storming and it definitely wasn’t in Transylvania, not even in the mountains.
Well, not so private and not really my property, since it’s a public beach, but at that moment, it was all mine, because it was night and it was deserted and I was there…all alone.
And it really went this way…
It was a beautiful sunset, reflecting on the ocean…
…and there I was, minding my own business, splashing barefoot in the surf and collecting salt and sand in the cuffs of my rolled-up jeans, and…
…all of a sudden, there they were…three men in black overcoats (in the summer! in the South! Looking like Neo from The Matrix!), walking above the tide line…looking for something that was miles away from where we were…
And I was the lucky (?) person they chose to ask for directions…
Little did they know they were about to tangle with a smart-mouthed adolescent. And little did I know I was about to find myself sucked (no pun intended) into becoming the chronicler of three exiled, feckless (no, it’s not misspelled, that’s an ‘e’ in there) most hapless vampires in existence.
In my novel I’ve written a fanciful piece of how I met the Brothers Andriescu, a duo of vampires who, with their cousin, were touring the South looking for the site of the Battle of Bloody Marsh and how they became my patrons in the Art of Writing All Things Vampire. Take that with a grain of salt… or a clove of garlic, if you wish.
The Clan Andriescu is the story they told me, filled with pathos, adventure, fear, love and sex (there’s a difference, you know), rebellion, intrigue, humor…and a blood orange or two.
The Clan Andriescu…
MARIUS, head of the Clan…He can’t understand why the woman he loved in 1968 doesn’t want to re-ignite their affair in 2013…
VALERIUS, the baby brother… Ordered to marry, Val makes the wrong choice. Aneke’s all he wants but she’s human…all right to bite but not to marry…
TIMON, the cousin…being married to the most famous writer of vampire novels since Anne Rice can be exciting, until Laura writes an exposé proving vampires are real.
“Back, foul fiend!” TP crossed one forefinger over the other, holding his hands in front of him.
“What the Hell are you doing?” The one called Val demanded, jumping back with a hiss.
Timon reached out, knocking TP’s hands apart. “That won’t help you,” he snarled. “We’re Jewish!”
“Don’t believe him.” Val recovered, leaning forward to whisper rather earnestly, “We’re Russian Orthodox. Really.”
“I-I heard it in a Dracula movie the other night.” TP looked a little disappointed at their reaction.
“Dracula.” Marius looked disgruntled. “The best example of bad press, if ever there was. He should’ve bitten his publicist.”
“If you’re through dissing Dracula, would you tell me…Wh-where am I?” wavered TP. “What have you done to me?”
“Done to you?” They looked at each other and back at him. “Nothing.”
“Don’t lie. I know what you are. Exactly.”
“Okay.” Timon walked over to the fainting couch and slouched on it, legs crossed, hands behind his head. “I’ll bite.” He looked as if he’d like to do just that. “What are we? Exactly?”
“Vam…” He began to laugh, displaying those overlong eyeteeth. “You’ve got a sense of humor, kid, I’ll give you that.”
The Clan Andriescu is published by Class Act Books,
Paperback at the publisher’s website: http://www.classactbooks.com/cat-romance/cat-romance-paranormal/the-clan-andriescu-pod-print-detail
POSTED FOR TONY-PAUL DE VISSAGE.